Hemmed In

You hem me in—behind and before; you have laid your hand upon me. (Ps 139:5 NIV)

The word hem above, translated beset in the KJV comes from a Hebrew word which is translated to bind, besiege, confine, cramp, secure, shut in, shut up, enclose, show hostility to, be an adversary, treat as a foe, form, fashion, delineate.

The NKJV of this verse is: You have hedged me behind and before, and laid Your hand upon me. The NASB renders it: You have enclosed me behind and before, And laid Your hand upon me. Interestingly the AMP words this verse: You have beset me and shut me in--behind and before, and You have laid Your hand upon me.

By now you probably wonder if there is a point to all this. Yes there is! I am telling you where I am. It may begin to make more sense after you read the following quote by Dr Larry Crab: “Authenticity says, Here's where I am in my journey to knowing God better, as opposed to vulnerability, which is Here's where I am hurting most. Vulnerability can be narcissistic.”

Here's where I believe I am in my journey to knowing God better. I am hemmed in by God. I can’t go forward and I can’t go backward. Side steps are out of the question, so here I am, standing still and unable to advance and unable to run. It is a place of immobility but also of protection. I have been shut in and shut up. God seems to have confined me and has me right where He wants me.

I know I will make it through, because of God’s promises and because His hand is upon me. He has cramped my style and is fashioning me as He sees fit. He is strengthening, changing, molding, and forming me. He is describing who He is, who I am, and defining how I fit into His purposes. He is making me who He has called me to be, so He can put me where He wants me to be, doing what He has called me to do, when He wants me to do it.

Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, too lofty for me to attain. (Ps 139:6 NIV)

Psalm 139

For the director of music. Of David. A psalm.

1 O LORD, you have searched me and you know me.
2 You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar.
3 You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways.
4 Before a word is on my tongue you know it completely, O LORD.
5 You hem me in—behind and before; you have laid your hand upon me.
6 Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, too lofty for me to attain.
7 Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence?
8 If I go up to the heavens, you are there; if I make my bed in the depths, you are there.
9 If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea,
10 even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast.
11 If I say, "Surely the darkness will hide me and the light become night around me,"
12 even the darkness will not be dark to you; the night will shine like the day, for darkness is as light to you.
13 For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb.
14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.
15 My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place. When I was woven together in the depths of the earth,
16 your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.
17 How precious to me are your thoughts, O God! How vast is the sum of them!
18 Were I to count them, they would outnumber the grains of sand. When I awake, I am still with you.
19 If only you would slay the wicked, O God! Away from me, you bloodthirsty men!
20 They speak of you with evil intent; your adversaries misuse your name.
21 Do I not hate those who hate you, O LORD, and abhor those who rise up against you?
22 I have nothing but hatred for them; I count them my enemies.
23 Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts.
24 See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.